29 July 2010

Things Bloggers Do #3

I really intended to post between the TBD series this week.  I don't even have a legitimate excuse, so, I'll make one up.  I...was...washing my hair.

3.  Giveaways






Giveaways are the only time you get to be more charitable than Mother Theresa and Oprah, as long as the people entering follow your 304,038,923 steps. Am I right?



“Here, take an Anthro (because no one types out Anthropologie in blogland anymore) gift card, some rubies, my grandmother’s quilt, and also my firstborn!”


All you have to do is:



- Stand on your rooftop and shout the name of my blog (and spell it out) for roughly 3 hours.



- Once you get more than 40 people congregating on your lawn, have them come inside to physically sit down one by one and push the ‘FOLLOW’ button on my blog



- If any resist, your entry doesn’t count. Sorry!



- I may or may not be condoning the use of guns to make them follow. If you choose to use guns, please do not directly comment the use of said guns – email me personally.



- Vistaprint makes some wonderful static cling car decals – I happen to have them made up just for my blog, Twig! Be sure to slap one on every clean surface of your car for a double entry!



- Tweet about it



- Blog about it



- Facebook it



- Tattoo it on your forehead


There really are a lot of chances to enter this awesome giveaway! Oh, by the way, commenting, tweeting, and facebooking only count for .1 percent of an actual entry, so I hope you’re not afraid of heights!! Hurry! The contest ends one week from today!”
 

I think my drawings turned out looking like Amy Winehouse today..hmm


See?  Amy Winehouse! hahaha..

***

There’s also the giveaways out there featuring a less than awesome prize that leaves you wondering if they even get the concept…(Thanks to Megan of Shabby Blogs for this awesome TBD idea!)







“Giveaway: My kid’s second grade macaroni project and some used Band-Aids









Hi lovelies! (By the way, ‘lovelies’ is an entirely different TBD post subject that will be addressed at a later date)





I’m in such a generous mood today! I’ve decided to give away my lil’ snugglipuffs macaroni art project! I know its missing a few pieces, but that just adds to the charm of it all. There might even be some rustic, vintage mold on a few noodles. I really think the addition of used band-aids makes the prize package so industrial chic. I can’t wait to see what awesome vignettes you create with them!







If you enter today, I’ll also include the glue stick that my child used to make the project! A half used glue stick!”



Megan said it better than I ever could in response to this sort of giveaway: “Who wins there? No one!” ha. Well stated.

***

ON the flip side of things, let’s talk about giveaway comments. As the giveaway-ee (that’s my new word. Go ahead, I just gave that to you, feel free to adopt it, love it, use it.) There’s nothing more discouraging than seeing a comment in a giveaway that goes like this:



“Anonymous said:
Hi thank you for the lovely things. I hope I win.”



Really? I hope you don’t win because I HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE!

Are you blogging from space? Mount Olympus?

Is someone holding you at gunpoint and forcing you to comment for an entry?

Are you a secret government spy who REALLY wants a chance at that Anthro giftcard but can’t give out your name?


I’d understand it more then. And I sincerely apologize to those of you that entered by anonymous comment who are spies, held at gunpoint, or blogging from another realm.



Here’s another funny comment I get a lot:



“Xx~_..--.._~xX said:
Fingers crossed! (Insert email here).”



Are you sure you don’t want to stand on the roof and shout the name of my blog at least once? You sure you don’t want to blog about the giveaway somewhere? Maybe write it on your notebook or something? Ok then, good luck.

I’m just going to listen to Journey in the dark and eat my feelings.





Is it sad that my excitement about the giveaway is directly proportionate to the content of entry comments?



(I just had to google “How to make bar graphs” Someone needs to go back to school instead of blogging all day).



(I just had to google “How to make LINE graphs because bar graphs were NOT what I wanted).


I still didn't get it right.  Look at that "quality of comments" floating up there in space...he should be hanging out on the left side with his friends! Crap.  I'm a failure. 


What about the comments where they try to guilt trip you into picking them? Those are always awkward.



“Lonely and misunderstood says:
I’d love to win your Anthro gift card. You see, I’ve never had the courage to actually go into that store. It’s truly been a dream of mine for so long, and my grandmother’s dying wish was for me to go into one. Of course if I did, I wouldn’t have any fun because a bank robber stole all of my money. So you see, this is why you need to pick me to be the winner.”



Never mind that it’s a random pick for winner. This person is determined.



Well, I’ll probably never win another giveaway, ever, or have any more  friends.…but thanks for humoring me. You can catch previous TBD posts by clicking here and here, and you can always email me at twigdecor@yahoo.com with suggestions! Thanks again Megan!!!



NOW...if you'll excuse me, I have some giveaways to enter...

25 comments:

One Blonde Girl said...

I'm on the fence about giveaways, probably because I never win, but bitterness aside, I can't stand it when all a blogger does is have lame-o giveaways (which, however, aren't nearly as bad as the giveaway/review combo). That being said, I occasionally enjoy entering them from time to time, but only if it's something that I think is really cool. I'm sure there are tons of people out there who do nothing but enter giveaways all day, but I'm not one of them.

Oh, and don't even get me started on "Lovelies". Yuck.

Kiri said...

I love giveaways...and "lovelies"! :) Does that make me a bad person? lol

~Kiri

Zaira said...

Ahahahahahah I'm still laughing!!!! It's really as you described, you had courage!!!

ps. I'm on the roof shouting my blog, so you will pick me??? ;)

Zaira xx

Sarah said...

This is hilarious. I love and hate giveaways so much. Oh hello 379 comments to review that each say ,"I hope I win." No fun. But I love winning...okay so I've never won either.

http://wearingitonmysleeves.blogspot.com

Olive Cooper said...

This is good stuff you write here. I applaud your honesty. Well done. I never win and many times do not enter. All the endless rules drive me to distraction. Could we not follow each other's blog's because we want to? olive@oliveout

.Twig. said...

I should have posted all the links to my own giveaways so that people know I do the same things too lol! Anyway, yes. We all do it. Thank you all for the awesome comments. My happiness meter is going up..haahaha. ;)

Samantha2818 said...

I only enter the giveaways with something I want to win as my luck would be that the one time I win I would get the macaroni picture! I never win though - I'm sure they're all fixed and don't pick me to save on the postage to Wales (just kidding of course!).
This series is so funny.
By the way hop on over to my blog for an "I don't like fish" poster giveaway!
~Sam

paige said...

HYSTERICAL!!
& by far my fave one yet
amen!

Lolo said...

You are too funny! Love your Amy Winehouse drawing (esp the one of her on the floor - still crackin up!)

Oh and are you listening to Bryan Adams or Journey? Cuz those lyrics on your wall are from "Open Arms"....
Happy Thursday! :D

fawn said...

I have been loving your cartoons lately. I used to pass the time at a student job making people laugh with MS Paint.

I must confess that I love a good giveaway. But people should remember to keep them fun. I don't want to jump through a dozen hoops just to enter and it really bugs me when they're overtly self-serving. (e.g. to enter you must vote for me in a contest I'm trying to win, etc.)

P.S. As much as I love the store, the name "Anthropologie" is pretty ludicrous to begin with.

Cole said...

You are so honest and brave to post this. When I first started blogging I remember I thought the whole giveaway thing was weird. not going to lie. Now I have about 2 a month. ha! I converted over to the way of blog world. :) So I can't say anything bad. My giveaways actually have nice things though. ;)

Ms. Bake-it said...

Cracking up here! The giveaway entrants that say, "PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME" just blow my mind. Only in my last giveaway did I add hoops but I did not feel good about it so will go back to no hoops.

Love these posts!

~ Tracy

simplydelicious said...

I'm dying! I never win...in fact i secretly think no one ever wins...then I read a blog now and then that lists the five or six giveaways that they just won!!!! Are part of the "In" crowd?? Are the "Popular" girls? How the heck did they just win 5 giveaways...I'm just sayin....
~Karen

erin said...

o.k...milk coming out of my nose laughing here!

Elisa and Dusty said...

I about busted a gut on this one!! I am new to the blogging world and as much as I would like people to follow me, I can't lean into this giveaway process. Seems way too over the top for me which may be why I only have 17 followers:(

I thank your for validating my feelings. Rock on lady and may you see your followers double!!!

~Elisa

vintagesusie & wings said...

Seems like you've hit on a HOT topic!!! Giveaways...hmmmmm. I've only had 1, the only rule was to leave a comment as I HATE when they make you add their giveaway button in order to win. This is America, what if I hate your picture & it will make my blog ugly. Sorry, I can't abide by that. Prizes, they do have to be at the very least good. My problem with my giveaway was the winner lived in New Zealand & I had to spend more on shipping the stuff then it was probably actually worth. But I'm coming up on 300 followers & want to have a giveaway for that only I'm thinking about my winners having to be from the US or Canada. Is that terrible? On my next giveaway I'll make them have to be from So Cal so I can just drive it over on my way to Target! lol
But I'm addicted to blogging, so it's all good! & yes, I'm ashamed to admit, I call my friends by a term of endearment...but I'm not telling you. You'll just make fun of me. lol
Smiling Big...
Susie

Megan said...

Brilliant.

Jenny said...

Wow, what a great post. OK, OK. I'm gonna cut back on the shouting from the roof thing for my giveaways. Maybe that was just a teensy weensy bit over the top.

Sigh.

Really funny writing here.

Yvonne said...

I love your sense of humor!

Danielle said...

Well on my search for a fun pic for my first ever giveaway, I found this blog and so I'm sending the credit along to you (and maybe some friends too!)

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Gomez said...

Seems like you've hit on a HOT topic!!! Giveaways...hmmmmm. I've only had 1, the only rule was to leave a comment as I HATE when they make you add their giveaway button in order to win. This is America, what if I hate your picture & it will make my blog ugly. Sorry, I can't abide by that. Prizes, they do have to be at the very least good. My problem with my giveaway was the winner lived in New Zealand & I had to spend more on shipping the stuff then it was probably actually worth. But I'm coming up on 300 followers & want to have a giveaway for that only I'm thinking about my winners having to be from the US or Canada. Is that terrible? On my next giveaway I'll make them have to be from So Cal so I can just drive it over on my way to Target! lol But I'm addicted to blogging, so it's all good! & yes, I'm ashamed to admit, I call my friends by a term of endearment...but I'm not telling you. You'll just make fun of me. lol Smiling Big... Susie

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