Some things

I'm feeling rather uninspired today.  Mostly because I left my camera on and the battery is completely gone. 

I also lost my charger a while back.  I'm on a mission to find a cheap one today, as I have a wedding reception to take pictures for tomorrow.  Why am I blogging when I have like 20 other things to do?  Blogging is worse than crack cocaine sometimes.  Not that I've harnessed the power of crack cocaine at any point in life.

That reminds me...remember when we had that Anthrax scare?  Well, I got this letter in the mail one time that had white powder all OVER it.  Like massive amounts.  I thought for sure I was gonna die until I realized that it was some makeup my mom bought off Ebay.  Good story....wow this post is going NOWHERE. 

I have this awesome picture of my growing ironstone collection, sitting on top of my old wooden island, with some awesome sun rays coming in from the window that I was going to share with you too.  Is the description doin' it for you? No?  I didn't think so..

Instead, I'm gonna share some music with you that I find rather inspiring...

 I will be taking the "autoplay" off my playlist for now so that you don't have a heart attack when trying to play these videos...

This is Jeff Pianki.  He's one of my absolute favorite artists, and he's not well known.  From his lyrics, to his instruments, to that red hair of his...he's just a great artist. 

Here's one of his original songs:

You can go to www.jeffpianki.com and download his EP.  You can name your own price or download it for free...

Anyway...just thought I'd throw a little aural inspiration at ya.  Love it. 

P.S. I just found a battery charger for 20.00 at Vanns.  I'll be back later with that ironstone picture.  And I promise I won't draw it in Microsoft Paint like my last 3 posts.

Things Bloggers Do #3

I really intended to post between the TBD series this week.  I don't even have a legitimate excuse, so, I'll make one up.  I...was...washing my hair.

3.  Giveaways

Giveaways are the only time you get to be more charitable than Mother Theresa and Oprah, as long as the people entering follow your 304,038,923 steps. Am I right?

“Here, take an Anthro (because no one types out Anthropologie in blogland anymore) gift card, some rubies, my grandmother’s quilt, and also my firstborn!”

All you have to do is:

- Stand on your rooftop and shout the name of my blog (and spell it out) for roughly 3 hours.

- Once you get more than 40 people congregating on your lawn, have them come inside to physically sit down one by one and push the ‘FOLLOW’ button on my blog

- If any resist, your entry doesn’t count. Sorry!

- I may or may not be condoning the use of guns to make them follow. If you choose to use guns, please do not directly comment the use of said guns – email me personally.

- Vistaprint makes some wonderful static cling car decals – I happen to have them made up just for my blog, Twig! Be sure to slap one on every clean surface of your car for a double entry!

- Tweet about it

- Blog about it

- Facebook it

- Tattoo it on your forehead

There really are a lot of chances to enter this awesome giveaway! Oh, by the way, commenting, tweeting, and facebooking only count for .1 percent of an actual entry, so I hope you’re not afraid of heights!! Hurry! The contest ends one week from today!”

 

I think my drawings turned out looking like Amy Winehouse today..hmm

See?  Amy Winehouse! hahaha..

***

There’s also the giveaways out there featuring a less than awesome prize that leaves you wondering if they even get the concept…(Thanks to Megan of Shabby Blogs for this awesome TBD idea!)

“Giveaway: My kid’s second grade macaroni project and some used Band-Aids

Hi lovelies! (By the way, ‘lovelies’ is an entirely different TBD post subject that will be addressed at a later date)

I’m in such a generous mood today! I’ve decided to give away my lil’ snugglipuffs macaroni art project! I know its missing a few pieces, but that just adds to the charm of it all. There might even be some rustic, vintage mold on a few noodles. I really think the addition of used band-aids makes the prize package so industrial chic. I can’t wait to see what awesome vignettes you create with them!

If you enter today, I’ll also include the glue stick that my child used to make the project! A half used glue stick!”

Megan said it better than I ever could in response to this sort of giveaway: “Who wins there? No one!” ha. Well stated.

***

ON the flip side of things, let’s talk about giveaway comments. As the giveaway-ee (that’s my new word. Go ahead, I just gave that to you, feel free to adopt it, love it, use it.) There’s nothing more discouraging than seeing a comment in a giveaway that goes like this:

“Anonymous said:

Hi thank you for the lovely things. I hope I win.”

Really? I hope you don’t win because I HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE!

Are you blogging from space? Mount Olympus?

Is someone holding you at gunpoint and forcing you to comment for an entry?

Are you a secret government spy who REALLY wants a chance at that Anthro giftcard but can’t give out your name?

I’d understand it more then. And I sincerely apologize to those of you that entered by anonymous comment who are spies, held at gunpoint, or blogging from another realm.

Here’s another funny comment I get a lot:

“Xx~_..--.._~xX said:

Fingers crossed! (Insert email here).”

Are you sure you don’t want to stand on the roof and shout the name of my blog at least once? You sure you don’t want to blog about the giveaway somewhere? Maybe write it on your notebook or something? Ok then, good luck.

I’m just going to listen to Journey in the dark and eat my feelings.

Is it sad that my excitement about the giveaway is directly proportionate to the content of entry comments?

(I just had to google “How to make bar graphs” Someone needs to go back to school instead of blogging all day).

(I just had to google “How to make LINE graphs because bar graphs were NOT what I wanted).

I still didn't get it right.  Look at that "quality of comments" floating up there in space...he should be hanging out on the left side with his friends! Crap.  I'm a failure. 

What about the comments where they try to guilt trip you into picking them? Those are always awkward.

“Lonely and misunderstood says:

I’d love to win your Anthro gift card. You see, I’ve never had the courage to actually go into that store. It’s truly been a dream of mine for so long, and my grandmother’s dying wish was for me to go into one. Of course if I did, I wouldn’t have any fun because a bank robber stole all of my money. So you see, this is why you need to pick me to be the winner.”

Never mind that it’s a random pick for winner. This person is determined.

Well, I’ll probably never win another giveaway, ever, or have any more  friends.…but thanks for humoring me. You can catch previous TBD posts by clicking here and here, and you can always email me at twigdecor@yahoo.com with suggestions! Thanks again Megan!!!

NOW...if you'll excuse me, I have some giveaways to enter...

Things Bloggers Do #2

#2:  Using nicknames for your family that they would loathe outside of blogland

What are yours? C’mon. Think of it right now, you know you have one! Or at least had before you realized it wasn’t cool anymore...

Lets look at the different types of blog nicknames to get a better understanding of the bloggers behind them.

***

I’ll be the first example. People who DON’T use nicknames. We’re the blogging equivalent of those people who let their kids run around in stores without knowing where they are. Or the ones who leave their debit card somewhere and don’t realize it until later (been there, done THAT).

Girls, we might as well be tattooing our routing number on our head if we don’t use nicknames. In fact, we should just use social security numbers for corresponding family members as nicknames.

....Just because I drew TWO pictures for this part...

***

Then, there’s the ever so common “Mr. T”

You first initialers, if you will, are just dipping your feet in. You’re ok with leaving mail lying around the house with your name on it in photos. You leave the occasional receipt sitting inside the gas station pump without turning around to go get it. You’re pretty fearless…but JUST IN CASE, you better mask your husband’s name for some family protection. Use the first initial of his real name so that blogland still loves you for being YOU. You’re the Wilson (from Home Improvement) of blogland.

Hidey, Ho Neighbor!

***

Finally, those of you who go all out. Those of you who make it absolutely impossible to know who your family is. You don’t even use your real family in pictures…but trust me, the neighbors are going to suspect your little “photo shoots” of their children after awhile…I’m on to you.

I used to refer to Tanner as Mr. Pickleshoes until he threatened to leave me…

Just kidding, I didn’t call him Mr. Pickleshoes. Truth is, I really don’t think that any of the people reading my blog are creepy pedophiles or serial killers. They have much better things to do like playgrounds….Yahoo! Chat rooms….more popular blogs like yours…. Tee hee.

You guys are PROTECTED. No person or spam organization is ever going to show up on your doorstep as a result of negligent name dropping on your blog. Bra-VO.

So as you can see, it just depends on which way you want to go. Do you want to wear a knight costume as you blog? Or do you want to give up your identity and become homeless? I report, you decide. Like Fox News, only not as “all up in your business.”

***

In case you missed last weeks “Things Bloggers Do,” you can click here! As always, none of this is meant to offend anyone. We all do these things, so why not laugh at them? Feel free to email suggestions for “Things Bloggers Do” to twigdecor@yahoo.com.

 

An Outdoor Picnic...

Getting together with old friends is so much fun.  Especially when you mix in a beautiful day, an outdoor picnic, and awesome food.  The most expensive part was the food.  Everything else came from my house and garage sales.  Don't you love that something this beautiful can be done for so little?

I've wanted to put together a portfolio for event planning for awhile now, so this weekend provided an amazing opportunity.  I even got to hand out some cards to a curious jogger who spotted us. 

We enjoyed a tart made with carmelized onions, tomatoes, and the best crust I've had in a long time. 

We paired it with a pesto barley salad, and an awesome mixture of corn, black beans, and cilantro. 

I will post recipes later this week!  All of our food was made by Sarah, who also designed my blog cards.  She has been my best friend since 5th grade. 

I got these chairs off of craigslist (and from a friend!  Upon arriving to pick them up, I found out it was a gal that had a yard sale I went to earlier this year.  She's a total sweetheart!) and they are actually from a cafe in Paris.  It makes them all the more special. 

Styling the picnic was easy, as I just took a few things from my house, strapped my kitchen table in the back and headed out.  Sarah's mom had some amazing vintage tablecloths that we used as well!

I have to credit my friend Kasey for the amazing Sangria recipe she posted about a few months back.  We made and enjoyed it all day long.  It was great in the heat, and had us giggling pretty fast....

Just spotted a bug in the sangria...nice...we drank it all.

This is my flea market find from a couple weeks ago.  Its beautiful.  No wiring, loose, broken in parts, but plenty of room for candles, and overall posing for pictures.  Its now residing in my bedroom. 

This is Jill.  She moved away in 6th grade, but we've kept in touch over the years.  Her family used to live across the dam from mine, and her dad worked for the dam, so when we wanted to get together, he'd open up and we'd just walk right across instead of driving like 20 extra miles.  So awesome.  She just completed Ironman, and for those of you who don't know what it is, its a triathlon consisting of a 2.4 mile swim, a 112 mile bike ride, and a 26 mile run.  Without a break.  What a rockstar! 

I kind of went overboard on the parasol pictures as you will see later on...but they all turn out so cute!  That parasol is amazing. 

This is Rory.  I only knew her for about a year before she moved at the  beginning of 6th grade, but we had a ton of fun together.  She is so beautiful!  She has an amazingly cute little boy named Baron (love the name) and they live in Calgary, AB.  We found out it's only like 4 hours from Kalispell so....more road trips will be happening in the future!!

Found my straws on Etsy.  Cheap and SO adorable.  There are several different colors to choose from.

Beautiful picture of Sarah.  We have been through so many awesome things together since 5th grade.  I honestly don't think I know a cooler person than her.  I wish we were closer...she's in Portland which isn't an extremely long drive but life always seems to find reasons to not let me go there hehe. 

 I'll remember this weekend forever.  A super fun time with friends who can just pick up right where they left off.  Well, except for the fact that we're not playing with barbies anymore.  We're playing with lace parasols and broken chandeliers...and sangria.   

Things Bloggers Do

I've decided to start my own series called Things Bloggers Do.  It's full of cliches, terrible drawings, and humor dripping with sarcasm.  So fasten your seatbelt, you're about to get wet. 

Actually, before I start, I just want to let you know that this series is not meant to offend anyone, it's just meant to help us step outside our blogging bubbles to realize that there really are some pretty funny cliches.  I know that I partake in half of them, and honestly it's where I draw most of my series ideas from!  So let the fun begin, and feel free to email me with Things Bloggers Do suggestions, as I'll tackle just about anything.  

1.  DIY posts that leave you more confused than you started

You know the one. The one you’ve been excited about finding, or even the one you’re writing...

The supplies are usually laid out in a cute, fun, decorative and picture worthy manner…not too many surprises, maybe a weird measurement or two, but nothing your Martha Stewart loving, Country Living readin’ self can’t handle.

Step 1 starts out easy enough. It’s easy to read, makes sense, nice pictures to go along with it…and you get into a rhythm, already envisioning yourself with the awesome project before you.

Then, step 2 shows up and even by the picture you’re already confused. Did they start another DIY tutorial in the middle of the first one? I’m pretty sure there are supplies in there not mentioned on the original list….so you go back to the beginning. Did you miss something? Is “fabric” French for the supply that you’re missing?

Confident that you have what you need, you press on, hoping that your kids’ Sunday school pipe cleaners will double as wire….

Step 3 basically says something like this:

“Step 3: so that’s it! Voila! You now have a beautiful ruched, fabric rosette covered, ticking burlap hobo bag. Great job! See you next week with another DIY special!”

Um….

 

Food and babies...

Apparently I gravitate toward these subjects for my photos.  I get home and look at my camera card, and what do I find?  An abundance of babies and food.  There are also pictures of cute vintage things, but 75% are babies and food. 

(Sandy made these apple shortcakes....)

Is there a job where I can just take pictures of babies and food and get paid for it?  I probably would.  In between the market and making pillows...

which, by the way, I will be supplying a gal with my muslin flowers for her shop!  So excited!  It will be in an old house in VA.  I think I might need to take a PURELY BUSINESS trip to go see her shop...

Market research, we'll call it.

I can take notes on the statistics of how much money I spend vs. how much I have in my bank account...

and then I'll stop taking notes because it's tangible evidence that I. Have. A. Problem.

:)

 

(Also Sandy...)

Where was I?  Oh, yes...back to my career of babies and food.  I suppose if the whole "bring me babies and food and I will photograph them for money" thing doesn't work out, I could always produce some offspring of my own, train them to bake for me, and I could take pictures....

What's that?  Child labor laws?  Nah..they'd love it! 

Oh look, I found this picture from our first market...how appropriate!

Creepy?  I thought so too, that's why the name of the above picture is in fact, creepy.jpg.

I could class it up a bit and make a good name for my business like...

Babies and Buttercream

Confections and....cuties....oh my gosh I can't do it.  Thats almost as bad as those Mary Engelbreit drawings.  They are too much.  TOO much.  It's the same feeling I get when I look at this:

OH HOW CUTE...This kitten is about to rip the fabric of space and time...hope you enjoy that arm growing out of your hip...

Or this...

Never let wolves do LSD.   The outcome is bubbles and dreamcatchers and sparkles...wait...is this a dramatic representation of Twilight?!

HHHHH.... (thats my heavy sigh in case you didn't pick up on that..)

Boy, this post is all about random tangent isn't it? 

Lets look at some babies...

Unsuspecting papaw + Unsuspecting toddler = perfect photo op.

Well..this is awkward...I really don't know how to end this post since it was so random...so....here you go....

FIN.

P.S.  Enfants is French for children....and English for CLASSY ADVERTISING ELEMENT...